Emotional You: Dreams

Alice wasn't the only girl to fall down the rabbit hole and see weird and wacky things. Many pregnant women enter a strange wonderland at night in their dreams. After all, pregnancy is a huge event in a woman's life; while the body is occupied with a whole new life taking shape, the soul is busy trying to make sense of it.

Don't worry about the content of your dreams, even if they depict you having lots of sex with people other than your spouse, or leaving your baby by the roadside and hopping a Greyhound bus for Mexico. Dreams aren't very accurate forecasts of real events.

But don't dismiss them as "only a dream." Dreams can be honored for their symbolism, if not for their basis in reality. Dreams can help you get to real issues that may be on your mind or troubling you. If you keep dreaming night after night that your baby is in trouble and you can't get to him, for example, it may mean you're anxious about being a mom and you feel uncertain you will be able to care for a new baby. Take the clue and sign up for baby care classes at your hospital to gain skills and confidence.

Interestingly, there are several "dream themes" that seem to recur among pregnant women:

Anxiety dreams. Many first-time moms dream of giving birth to a full-grown adult. It may mean there is anxiety about going back to work and missing early babyhood. It could mean you're worried about labor and delivery, and the dream is reassuring because the baby emerges fully-grown without the scary business of labor and the uncertainty of childrearing.
Dreams about buildings. Maybe pregnant women do this because their own "inner space" is expanding. Studies have shown that the dream buildings get bigger, taller, and more complex as the pregnancy progresses.
Water dreams. Some pregnant women dream aquatic dreams, possibly because of amniotic fluid or the "breaking waters" that signify the onset of birth.
Baby animal dreams. Dreaming about puppies, chicks and kittens probably has to do with the cuddly baby to come.
Erotic dreams. These may be related to insecurity about attractiveness and a body that's growing larger every day. Sometimes in dreams spouses cheat, husbands disappear and the woman is left alone. Sometimes the woman herself has a "steamy dream" about an old boyfriend or the mail carrier. A sexy dream may just offer reassurance that a woman is still attractive. A dream about a cheating spouse may lead you to talk to your husband and ask for reassurance and a massage.
Dreams of harm coming to a family member or the baby. These dreams may reflect buried fears about parenthood. Try not to be discouraged by these dreams. They are not omens that something bad will occur in your family.

The best thing to do if a dream leaves you with a morning aftertaste of fear, anxiety or discouragement is to share them with someone you trust. Discussing such dreams will make you feel a lot better.

Date last reviewed: October 2002.

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