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WOMEN'S & CHILDREN'S | Family Maternity Center | Pregnancy Resource Center | Pregnancy Library | Emotions | Are you emotionally ready for a baby?
Are you emotionally ready for a baby?
How can anybody be absolutely sure that having a family is for her or him? For some people, it is easy. They have known all their lives that they wanted to be parents. It's almost instinctive.
But, for many other people, the decision is not so easy. It's important to be honest about your feelings. If you are uncertain, there are some things you can do:- Take a class offered by the hospital that addresses the joys and stresses of pregnancy and parenthood.
- Take care of a family member's baby overnight. Spend enough time with the baby to see what life with a baby is really like.
Ask yourself some questions
- What do you think a parent's responsibility is?
- Are you willing to have your freedom limited because of a baby's needs?
- How will your relationship with your partner change?
- How will you feel about less one-on-one time with your partner?
- How will your work be affected?
- How will your family finances be affected?
Think about how you feel when you answer these questions. Willing? Resentful? If you are uncertain about having a child, your feelings about specific questions like these can help you know your true desires.
Adding to your family: Factors to consider
If you are thinking of having another child, you'll want to think about how a new baby will affect the whole family:- People don't agree about how old your other child (or children) should be or how long Mom needs to recover from pregnancy when you decide to become pregnant again. Some people feel that spacing children close together results in closeness among the siblings. Others think that having other children be older is better because the parent has more time with each child. Talk to the healthcare provider of your children, a child development specialist or other parents and listen to their comments and what they say.
- Your lifestyle may be set in place with one child. Maybe it has been awhile since you have been awakened in the night or changed diapers. How will this affect you and your partner?
- What will adding to your family do to your finances? Can you afford the cost of additional childcare? Some women find it harder to continue working when a second or third child is born. You may wish to quit working for awhile. Evaluate your energy level, as well as finances.
- How old you are may determine whether it's time for another child. If you're in your early 40s, you can't afford to wait longer, but if you're in your 20s you may wish to continue your career for awhile. Be mindful that fertility rates begin to drop when a woman reaches age 35.
Date last reviewed: October 2002.
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